Wednesday 18 February 2015

Ending.


No kiss on the cheek before walking away
No hug of farewell, no words left to say
She'd wanted to hold him and never let go
To tell him she's sorry and loves him, but no
He'd stared straight ahead as she'd shut the car door
And driven away without a word more
She turned and she wiped some grit from her eye
While the moon up above saw straight through her lie

He fumbled his way back in through the door
The same door they'd left through an hour before
The cold and the crisp and the wintry sun
Had taken a bow now the night had begun
He tore off his gloves and his hat and his scarf
And sat in his seat with his feet by the hearth
Then gazed at the place where, an hour before
She'd sat her last sit and would sit there no more

He stared at the window but couldn't see past
The velvety night pressed against the cold glass
He watched as the raindrops rolled down the pane
And winced as he felt the tears building again
Threatening to spill and to roll down his cheek
He opted to snarl, to hide he was weak
He breathed deep and curled up while, high in the sky
The moon up above saw straight through his lie

Her train made good time but she'd noticed not
The passage of time or the tight, little knot
That dwelt deep inside her and prodded and poked
That niggled and fizzled, made her wish she still smoked
That thing she ignored, that she'd not give a name
The tight, little knot remained there just the same
Just one change to make on her long journey west
To a life she'd once had with her make-up a mess

He sat in his seat whilst his mind was elsewhere
He floundered and wallowed in morbid despair
He tried hard to focus on all that was bad
For fear that the good thoughts would make him feel sad
He thought of the sulking and fighting and tears
Getting more frequent with passage of years
He thought that he hated her, hoped that she'd die
Though the moon up above saw straight through that lie

Time to kill, time to dwell, time to try not to think
As she sat in the cafe not drinking her drink
She fumbled about in her purse for her phone
And looked at the screen and she let out a groan
Zero missed calls, no message unread
All he'd to say he'd plainly now said
She was glad he'd not called, she wasn't surprised
But the moon up above saw straight through her lies

A man is a man and a man will be man
So he went to the fridge and cracked open a can
Then slipped on his slippers and flopped himself down
Flicking through channels and wearing a frown
Hunger! That's it, that's the pain in his belly
He picked up his phone and he turned off his telly
He'd order a curry be brought to his door
Then drink enough beer so he'd miss her no more

The screen on his phone faded from black
To reveal that face staring straight back
The face of a woman now far, far away
He'd change that bloody picture, though just not today
Zero missed calls, no message unread
All she'd to say she'd plainly now said
He'd delete her tomorrow, from phone and life too
But the moon up above knew that that wasn't true

Each side of the platform, a train on each track
One taking her forward and one going back
To the life she'd messed up and the man that she'd hurt
She took a deep breath and she straightened her skirt
She shook her head clear, her choice had been made
The pain and the hurt would eventually fade
She'd spoiled it all now but she would remain strong
Though the moon up above knew, in this, she was wrong

Nothing on telly, he grabbed the remote
As the voice on the box urged him to vote
For whichever of the singers had hurt his ears least
He clicked the red button to make the voice cease
Then he looked once again at the face on the phone
And hoped that he'd make it now he was alone
He'd be fine, he was sure, no need to worry
"It'll all be alright. Now, where's my curry?"

She stepped from the train, there was no turning back
And set off with her suitcase that clickety-clacked
As it rolled and it bounced along right behind
The hurrying woman with taxi to find
She shook her head clear, her choice had been made
But it wasn't her choice, if it were she'd have stayed
Curled up in a ball on the seat right beside
The man she'd betrayed, and she finally cried

He stood by the door to the little back yard
Smoking and drinking and trying so hard
To think about nothing, to breathe and relax
To think of the future, not dwell on the past
If only he'd known the last kiss that they'd had
Before his whole world had turned out so bad
Was the last kiss forever and soon she'd be gone
He'd still hold her tight and the kiss would go on

The taxi pulled up at the end of the street
The street from the past that now greeted her feet
She counted the coins into the chubby hand
Of the driver who'd driven, who'd chatted and
Had told her a story all about how
A football team had wowed a crowd
She thanked him and turned, took a mirror from her purse
Glanced at herself, she'd never looked worse

He could hold it no longer, that last beer wanted out
So he'd nipped to the toilet at just about
The same time that the finger had pressed the doorbell
He'd only just started, "Oh, bloody hell"
He called through the house, "Yes, yes, just a tick"
Dashing downstairs and replacing his dick
"I'm sure you lot watch until we're indisposed"
He moaned as he finished straightening his clothes

He opened the door to the man with the smile
That'd brought his hot food over many a mile
He tipped him and thanked him and bid him goodbye
Then hurried indoors with a tear in his eye
He taken the bags and realised what he'd done
A meal for two instead of for one
He looked at the space on the seat right beside
His place on the couch, and he finally cried

The smile of the man as they passed in the street
Went unnoticed by her as she stared at her feet
The door from her past now barring her way
She realised she had no idea what she'd say
She'd made a mistake and this was the end
Of the life that she'd broken and just couldn't mend
So now in the cold and the dark she was stood
Chewing her lip like a cow would it's cud

His appetite lost, he grabbed coat and hat
And his keys and his phone and the money that
If he rushed down the street to the pub on the corner
He could turn in to beer to supply tears to mourn her
And help him to sleep when the time to sleep came
If he drank enough maybe he'd forget her name
The future starts here, as is always the way
A new year of your life starts every new day

A check of the mirror and lick of the lips
She straightened her skirt over her hips
She reached for the doorbell, the time had now come
She'd made her mistakes, what's done had been done
She, just like we, couldn't alter what's been
It was time to move forward, see what's to be seen
The future starts here, as is always the way
A new year of your life will start every day

With a coat on his back and a hat on his head
He went through the back door to the passage that led
Past the bins, where he dumped the two big bags of food
And into the street where the wind matched his mood
Biting and chilly and harsh and so bleak
And bringing forth tears that stung at his cheek
He turned up his collar, tipped forward his head
And wished he'd gone to bed instead

It wasn't the plan, it shouldn't be so
She traveled so far and he wasn't at home
She pressed and pressed and pressed once again
But no sound of life came from within
This house from her past with her future behind
Where no lights were lit behind the blinds
While high up above the big moon did look down
And think, "Pretty girl, why not just turn around?"

She'd made a mistake, what had she done?
Thrown everything away on some meaningless fun
She shouldn't have come here, it just wasn't right
So she stepped from the porch into silvery moonlight
"Oh" did she say after turning away
From the door to the street where, blocking her way
Stood a man in a hat and a coat and who
Smiled despite tears and she smiled too

They fumbled their way back in through the door
The same door they'd left through some hours before
The door to the future they knew would be hard
"Sit down" he called out as he dashed to the yard
No talking that night, they'd no need to hurry
Curled up and enjoying their microwaved curry
What's done is done, the past's set in stone
But the future's a tapestry still being sewn

J2H.

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